Negotiating Your Yes

Cheryl Richardson, a renowned life coach, inspired the topic for this post. Recently, on her website, Cheryl wrote, "I quickly made a list of ten things to say yes to, ten things to say no to, and then things that contribute to a great life, overall" (http://www.cherylrichardson.com/newsletters/week-41-spontaneous-wisdom-101010-lists-that-make-life-better/). Her top ten list of tips to help you have a great life got me thinking...

It’s human nature to say ‘yes’ when you mean ‘no’ especially when saying ‘no’ would require a tough conversation. Unfortunately, conceding to unfavorable requests can create problems, putting you in a situation that requires you do something that you don’t want to do and, ultimately, is not good for you.

We rarely take time to create a list of our important workplace ‘no’s’ and ‘yes’s’. So, how do we know how to respond to others’ requests? ‘No’s’ should be given to those situations or circumstances that are not supportive for you or smart to do. The critical ‘yes’ should be reserved for situations that help to engender a positive working environment, create more value for your company and clients, bring increased profitability and productivity or simply give you more energy.

My experience in partnering with the best leaders within international media and entertainment organizations has led me to develop my own top twelve list of the best practices of when to say ‘yes’ and when to run for the hills:

Twelve things to say YES to:
1. Giving greater value to your organization
2. Getting to know what’s most important to your colleagues
3. Asking questions for understanding
4. Mentoring others
5. Connecting people
6. Building relationships instead of networks
7. Creating opportunities to learn
8. Knowing your audience before you communicate
9. Building and leveraging your brand
10. Taking breaks in the day
11. Developing your boss
12. Stepping up to opportunities that stretch you

Twelve things to say NO to:
1. Neglecting yourself and your people
2. Running on emergencies (yours and others)
3. Implementing change without a twelve-month communication strategy to generate employee buy in
4. Pushing yourself when you are exhausted
5. Launching into a tough conversation without preparation
6. Delaying swift action with a non-performer
7. Holding a meeting without preparation
8. Blaming and resenting others
9. Creating goals without an understanding of how they fit into the broader organizational actions, plans and priorities
10. Harboring negative thoughts
11. Refusing to ask for feedback
12. Delaying implementing a development plan that betters YOU

Create your own top ten lists and begin putting your words and intentions into action. These steps will give you more power to showcase your leadership and set you up for success!